Own it to own your life

Ownership is the way to success. 

Owning our truths is the process of acknowledgement of all that is, good and bad, right and wrong, love and hate. Overlooked and misunderstood by many, it affects everything in our lives, from our mental state, to the way we socialise and the choices we make. 


Probably one of the most powerful tools in our arsenal, that leads to great wins, contented lives, genuine and heartfelt relationships.. We just need to learn to use it, at any time, circumstance and with everyone we interact with.



Grasping our power back

Life is a challenge, it’s traumatising, it’s unfair, it’s vengeful, it’s uncanny, it’s a lot, but we know it can be, we know there’s so little we can control, then why decide to be negative about it? Why do we feel like things happen to us? That we’re some sort of victim to life and the hurdles that come with it?


We all go through trauma, incidents and wrongful doings, so where does our power stand? 

Our power stands in how we react, how we choose to let things bring us down or see it as an opportunity, it stands in how we choose to handle the situation.


Of course some events are harder than others, some life-threatening as it happens, but after it occurs we get to make the accident our gift, our wake-up-call, our way forward, and for some believe it or not, our purpose in life.


Countless are the stories of people being the victim and regaining that power by ensuring others do not undergo the same. They chose to learn from it, find the reason as to why this was allowed to happen and do something about it. 


The Greats, the Legends, were and are who decide to rise above the hurts suffered and demand change, by making the change. They don’t indulge negativity, they accept its unfolding without buts. Life’s too short to feed intrusive thoughts, to find someone or something to blame, to hide. 



Every situation we find ourselves in, we’ve put ourselves in.

“If you see that you’re constantly being victimised by people, ask yourself, “What am I doing or not doing to make people think they can treat me this way?”.”


Here’s a quote that stuck with me by the ex federal special Agent, Evy Poupouras on Women of Impact podcast with Lisa Bilyeu, a must watch for anyone struggling with adversity. 


Everyday we go on with our lives blaming whatever happened to us on others or things, :

  • “The bus driver just ran past me without stopping!” “Was I there in time?”

  • “They cheated on me, what an asshole!” “Did I question our happiness or was I afraid to have that conversation and set boundaries, that led to us falling apart to a point of no return?”

  • “The government keeps on taking my money and I don’t have left enough to feed my kids” “Unfortunately that is never going to change, we’ll always have bills and taxes to pay, so how am I spending the money I do have left or what am I doing to change the amount of income I earn?”


There’s so many things we have control over, when we realise we are part of what created the issue itself. We need ownership and accountability to our own actions before we can start looking at anything else. A big step to our own happiness, needed and fundamental to our success, of course if we want successful lives, which does not mean necessarily financially, but emotionally, relationship wise and spiritually also.


“If it was my fault then it means that I have the power to do something about it. If it’s someone else’s fault, then I’m waiting for someone else to fix me.” - Lisa Bilyeu



We are our own gatekeepers

We decide what energies we allow to cross the threshold, we decide, who comes in and who goes out when required. 


We also pick our people. “Do I want someone that’s going to feed into my negativity when I’m emotional or someone that will help me snap out of it and find a way forward, a solution for me to earn my power back? 


Look around and ask yourself “Who do you go to when you’re at your lowest or upset and what is their reaction?” 99% of times the people we love feel the need to be by our side, by teaming up against the problem, when in reality a great friend and supporter would go along the way of saying 


“Are you telling me this because you need someone to vent to or because you want to find a solution together? I’m not interested in the first as our lives are too precious to waste time and energy in negative emotions, instead let’s work together and find what would fix this so it does not happen again!”



Conclusion

If you couldn’t think of anyone that would support you to be solution oriented at your lowest, you might want to rethink and retrain your friendships, because guess what, we are the outcome of the people we spend most of our time with. 


Those who can’t deal with hurdles in a rational and controlled way, will always have drama in their lives, because the drama is created in the heath of the moment and once something is done or said, there’s no going back, there’s no “Sorry” that can take it back. 


“If you engage with every fool you deal with you become as predictable as that fool. Stop responding to everything.” - Evy Poumpouras 


Everyone has their own time when it comes to acknowledging and facing our emotions, some do it quicker and some need more time, but the important and needed step to take to live a contented life is to get to a point where we check-in with ourselves and recognise that hiding and pushing down our feelings is eventually going to hit us like a boomerang.


What are the things you feel you could take more responsibility for and how are you going to choose to apply it? Let me know in the comments, I might learn a thing or two from you too!


High school dropout, who emigrated from Italy to London in 2019. Spiritual being who confidently made her way to a life of contentment, freedom and individualistic thinking, in an illusive world.

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